A local resident, Joey Carney, left his job last summer in 2025 after working for 15 years off and on. He was ready for a major life change because he wanted to join the army. He stated that he was doing this “because I want lots of money and I’m tired of the village.” He was especially tired of Jada, who spilled water on his computer. Unfortunately, he was killed during the war between Russia and Ukraine. He was made a national hero, and everyone said they loved him because he was “so cool and great.” (Joey was writing this part—he is not cool at all.) Lucian killed him without knowing 😔
Satire.
